Awesome.

Today's blog topic

in 

Diabetes Blog Week 

is to write about all the "awesome" things Diabetes

or having diabetes has done or given to me. 

Not that having Diabetes is 

"awesome"

in any way, shape or form, because it isn't. 

Most of the time is sucks big time. 

A couple things I can think of that are not

NEGATIVE

about Diabetes has to be a couple things. 

1. It has made my husband and I 

get to know eachother on levels we never would have 

experienced or have needed to get through. 

I promise, it isn't easy,

and I would LOVE to take away his pain and worries, 

but I am very happy that he supports me and all the hard work it takes to manage this disease. 

2. Until probably January of this year

I never really knew 

another person with Type 1 diabetes. 

At least personally. 

I got my first phone call from the JDRF Volunteer to participate in the walk in my area

and she mentioned 

Kerri from SixUntilMe 

and since finding her and her blog, 

I truly don't feel as alone. 

Then came Kim from Textinng My Pancreas

and how I feel I can relate to her, 

and she is one heck of a girl!

I then found other blogs that helped me feel more and more

supported, even though I have only

has little conversation with these two and others. 

I am now participating in

Diabetes 365 (which I REALLY need to upload more pics)

and have met MORE people

that are just as fantastic. 

I guess I enjoy this new love for the DOC. 

I appreciate learning more about my Diabetes because of them. 

I am now a pumper and feel somewhat okay with that

because of ALL OF THESE PEOPLE. 

It's amazing how blogs of

complete strangers can make you feel good. 

The 3rd and LAST good thing I can think of related to my Diabetes

is the fact that Austin and I were able

to get pregnant 

and I am now in week 14 

of this pregnancy. 

I always worried that I would not be able to have children, and if I did

how hard it would be on me. 

I was scared when I got diagnosed in 2007 that

I would never get to feel having a child 

of my own out of my body.

I am glad that so far, Diabetes hasn't stopped me and my husband

from experiencing this.

So thank you Diabetes for allowing me 

to be this far in this pregnancy and 

PLEASE work with me to make sure this can happen. 

I might not hate you as much. 

Love Cassie!!

Ten things I hate about the DLife....

Today is day four of Diabetes Blog Week,

can you believe it?

I first want to say, before I jump into the 

topic for today, 

how thankful I am of the newly found (for me)

DOC as well as 

all of the support I've been having with my 

first time walking the JDRF walk, 

with becoming a pumper

and being a Type-1 and Pregnant all at the same time. 

I will admit, It's all a little exhausting right now

almost to the extreme

Diabetes Overload

but THANK YOU 

for all the support. 

I really appreciate it!

OKay, now the topic:

Ten things I hate about you, Diabetes - Thursday 5/12: Having a positive attitude is important . . . but let’s face it, diabetes isn’t all sunshine and roses (or glitter and unicorns, for that matter). So today let’s vent by listing ten things about diabetes that we hate. Make them funny, make them sarcastic, make them serious, make them anything you want them to be!!

 10 things I hate about You, Mrs. Diabetes

1. I hate the way you can't make up your mind. One moment

you say 134mg/dl then you shame me within the same

hour at 60mg/dl. Shame on you

2. I hate to fact that every single label needs to be seen by 

my eyes, or i don't believe it. I've had too many times where a wrong number was given and 13g is not the same at 43g.  I wish I 

would live one day without 

looking at a label. One ENTIRE day. 

3. I hate the "oh you have DIE-A-BEAT-EZ?" 

Yes, i do and explain I have type-1. See their puzzled face

and then explain how mine is different than what they

have heard. Don't even get me started on how they were able to 

"fix" or "cure" theirs with exercise.

4. I hate the stares. I hate them. ESPECIALLY 

at restaurants. I mean, I know we live in a nosy

society, but why do you non-T1 people

feel the need to talk about me, 

stare at me taking my blood sugar

and stare while you see my food come. Or about those waitresses who 

stare worse then the little girl behind you. 

I'm sorry, you're a grown man/woman, didn't your mother

teach you to NOT STARE. Ugghh

5. I hate having so much baggage. 

Test strips, meters, little pieces of paper to dab the blood on, 

insulin pens, needles, extra needles, my blog book, glucose tabs,

snacks, anti-bacterial gel, and now with the pump

2 of every pump supply known to man, plus batteries,

my small sharps container, more snacks all in baggies or 15g or less 

snack sizes,

Medical cards, change for quick snacks if i run out.

Seriously, no wonder we can't catch a break and use a 

clutch. It wouldn't close and be 15lbs. 

6. I hate those ignorant doctors. 

I hate when you have to actually 

EXPLAIN to your doctor

what type of Diabetes you have. 

(short, story)

( So as I went to my first OB appointment not too long ago, 

meeting the first of like 6 doctors I have to meet, 

and we talked about my diabetes, the history of it,

and she was somewhat 

not really feeling this was

believable information. 

Well, then i explained going on the pump and so on. 

Ten came time for her to examine me. 

She checked out my stomach and 

no joke, 

stepped back and asked what i was doing to myself

why I have so many bruises. 

She then said, 

do you take shots?

 WOMAN, ARE YOU STUPID. 

where have you been. Are you even a doctor 

If i were to have diabetes, give myself

multiple insulin injections

where to you assume these 

injections might end up sometime. 

IGNORANT. IGNORANT. IGNORANT. )

7. I hate knowing what my husband feels like when he hears

i'm in a bad mood, or I'm sad, or

i'm acting differently. 

Men have a hard enough time trying

to figure out woman, 

and now my poor husband has to 

figure out and distinguish if this 

emotion is

cassie related, diabetes related, pregnancy related

or bad day related. 

Bless HIM. 

8. I hate feeling like I am an inconvenience to people. 

I know my awesome family and

in laws probably don't feel or see this, 

but i feel like a bag of rocks

when they have to keep waiting for me, 

or when they have to be hungry because I can't eat yet. 

I feel bad because I MYSELF, am the ones

to change, mess with or disrupt their

schedule. I feel bad. 

 9. I hate that pregnancy is hard, 

but being pregnant 

and type-1 

really complicates things. 

I am still terrified of

what can happen, 

will I get high blood pressure,

will I NEED a c-section, 

Can i make it to week 39, or heck 38? 

I wish Diabetes wouldn't rob me of the 

thoughts of knowing things will be just fine. 

10. I really really stinking, big time, hate you diabetes. 

I know what life was like with out you, and

I hate you. 

I hate the things you do to me, make me feel, 

change my mood, 

affect my health insurance, make me pay too much money

and steal the

care free 

i-can-eat-what-i-want-to-or-not-eat-for-6-hours-and-be-fine. 

I hate you. I wish we never met. 

Now, i hope that i can finish the rest of the week

without crying each time i 

have to write about how much you affect me

or why i dislike you. 

Hopefully. 

-Cassie

Diabetes Bloopers/Outside the box

So for today's 

Diabetes Blog Week

as I read other entries, 

I realize even though I KNOW

I have had

many many bloopers

in the diabetes world, I cannot for the LIFE 

of me right now

think of one. 

So i decided to go ahead and do something 

COMPLETELY OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE,

please don't laugh too bad

I'm a creative person,

I promise

but not when it comes to 

artistic ability so i decided to welcome you 

into our home, at say about 7am-7:45am. 

This is me, with crazy curly hair, and before the pump

giving myself BOTH of my insulin's

YES, at the same time, 

i'm talented!!

All while pushing my dear dog

Kahuna, who is white NOT gray but 

I wanted you to see her, out the back door to go to the bathroom!!

Husband is NOT an early AM person, 

so I normally do the am routine

and take her out. 

Well, especially now, I

realized my poor neighbors have probably seen more of my body than they can handle. 

And YES, if you were thinking it, 

I have caught them outside,

while looking something like this. 

I just figure, either they think i'm super sick

or am a drug addict. 

Which ever, as a D, I feel I need to do what i have to do, 

and if it means using two hands, 

or say use the wall by the fridge to hold my insulin pen in my stomach

while i grab my items

I do. 

Husband however, HATES HATES HATES this part of me. 

Don't believe me,
Ask him! lol

Hope you enjoyed and hopefully laughed at my silly photo!!

Letter to our baby...

If you missed my first post with 

the Diabetes Blog Week

 you can check it out 

Here!

Here is the topic for today: In February the Wego Blog Carnival asked participants to write letters to their condition.  You can write a letter to diabetes if you’d like, but we can also take it one step further.  How about writing a letter to a fictional (or not so fictional) endocrinologist telling the doctor what you love (or not) about them.  How about a letter to a pretend (or again, not so pretend) meter or pump company telling them of the device of your dreams?  Maybe you’d like to write a letter to your child with diabetes.  Or a letter from your adult self to the d-child you were.  Whomever you choose as a recipient, today is the day to tell them what you are feeling.

I am writing my letter to our baby. 

Dear Baby, 

    I know for you I am just a regular mommy in training. You hear my heart beat, you feel my breaths in and out. You can sometimes hear daddy or Kahuna too. Sorry about daddy's music choices. To you, nothing seems out of ordinary. Maybe you notice sometimes mommy gets shaky, to you it might feel like an earthquake. Don't worry, I'll explain more when you're older. Maybe sometimes you feel weak like mommy? I'm sorry baby that even though you don't know any different, your mommy is different. Some people might call her special, or a miracle( more like YOU'RE a miracle) but there is something about YOUR mommy that makes her different than the others. I'm sorry you have to fight along with me to battle those earth quake feeling times, or the times where maybe for you everything seems to be still. Your mommy is special because she has this silly thing call Diabetes. Don't worry, I am doing my best to make sure you don't feel all my ups and downs, and lucky for you those silly finger sticks. Your mommy will always have this thing with her body that makes her poke her fingers, put a needle in her belly every few days, and give her body the medicine she needs. Don't worry baby this isn't your fault, this is something that just happened to your mommy. I want you to know, that despite the differences between your mommy and daddy, we both love you and love watching you grow. We are both making sure you are safe, healthy and have enough energy to keep growing big and strong. Mommy worries that some day you might have to feel what she feels, but hopefully you get daddy's great genes and won't have to worry about it. Always know baby, that even though your mommy is special in her own way, that you are loved, cared for and will always be the most important part in your parents lives. We love you before you can see us, we love you before you can yell at us, and most of all we love you before you know how great this life can really be. Thanks for letting me be your mommy, and for daddy to be yours!! Keep growing!!!

Love your Mommy and Daddy!!!

I can't help but always think

about the thought

that 

maybe one day

my child will have to learn

what my life is like. 

I hope this doesn't happen. 

I wish we knew ways

to help prevent this. 

I know that by reading sixuntilme

and what she is trying

for her daughter to 

do what she can

to prevent this but

is there something else?

Why do her doctors know that this might help

or that it can't hurt to try

but for me

they all tell me how hard

or difficult 

a gluten free diet is. 

I told them, 

who cares how bad it might taste,

or how much I might not like it. 

Doing ANYTHING to stop or prevent or prolong

a Type 1 Diagnoses 

is worth crappy 

food. 

However, i've tried one recently

on purpose

and guess what..

It was delicious. 

Maybe I just wish I didn't have it so bad

I will sacrifice anything

to make sure

even if it is a 5% 

chance, that 5% chance is worth it. 

Have you learned anything about

what you can do to help your

child or children 

fight or ward off

even temporarily

a type one diagnosis? 

If so, PLEASE SHARE!!

Thanks for reading:)

Attn: Pumpers...

After yesterday and writing about

who I admire in the

diabetes world

I admire
ANYONE

who has gone from multiple injections to 

the pump

and I will not believe when I was told

how hard the first week is, 

heck the 

first DAY.

I don't know If it is because of 

being pregnant

or because i work very well on sleep. 

Either way, 

I'm glad my blood sugar is staying low enough, however I do not enjoy

getting up so much in the night between blood sugar checks,

phone calls because I am too low,

potty breaks

or moving around and checking where my

pump is.

I'm sure I"ll get used to this but

I volunteered to work at 8:15am today knowing I won't be done running around

but for me trying to take it easy

is probably 

going to kill me for today. 

Pumpers, I admire you for doing this. 

Parents of pumpers: I COMPLETELY admire you. Not only 

would you have to pump and check like I am

but you would have to deal with a tired and or cranky

child. 

AMEN to T1' and Care Pancreas's. 

only 5 more days of this schedule.. hopefully.

Admiring the differences between us who are alike....

Diabetes Blog Week 2011

Today is the first of five days of Diabetes blog week with a new

topic for each day. 

Today's is about how great it is to learn from the perspectives of those unlike me. To pick a type of blogger who is different from me and explain why I admire them. 

First of all, I know we might be kind of the same but I really admire

those Type1's who have had diabetes for most if not almost

all of their lives. 

I got diagnosed when I was 21, 

so for me, my parents never had to learn or take the 

responsibility of making sure they were 

my pancreas. 

I have so much admiration for those who either have had diabetes for a majority or

long period of their life

or who are those parents

taking care of their T1's and being there

sole pancreas. 

I know how hard it is to look into the person 

who is your caregiver

or husband, or wife

or best friend

 who reminds and helps you whenever they can, 

because, for me, my poor husband deals with it all. 

I don't know how I would handle all the mood swings,

the blood sugars changes,

the quick responses needed

or even just thinking on the top of your head

for a quick

15g quick carbohydrate snack.

I admire all of you for living with this 

pain in the butt

for so long, or

for managing someone else's body

and what they cannot control.

To add to the people I admire,

I COMPLETELY, TOTALLY, WITH ALL MY BODY

admire ANY Type 1

who has carried babies inside of them.

Between

mood swings, body issues, blood sugar testings 10-20times a day

to crazy amount of insulin changes, to 

low blood sugars,

walking up three steps up and down and my body

seriously making me feel like i just RAN
and MARATHON. 

Ugghh. Maybe some of these or typical of a pregnancy, 

either way. 

Holy Moly.

I under estimated how great this experience might be

but how difficult this is all at the same time. 

Thanks for reading everyone, also look for my blog

tomorrow for the 2nd Diabetes Blog Week. 

Sometime this week, stay tuned for a play by play

of my life so far with

carrying our first baby

with Type 1.

-Cassie